First, yes, "Integritor" is spelled correctly. An Integritor isn't a superhero, but they could be if you consider yourself a personal hero for showing up for yourself every day. In the context of our series on developing the mindset of an Achiever, an Integritor is someone who tells the truth and does so effectively. One of the key areas for an Integritor is Conflict Management: understanding, addressing, and resolving conflicts constructively.

Areas for Growth:

• Identifies and addresses issues, concerns, or conflicts readily.
• Recognizes opportunities for positive outcomes in conflict situations.
• Accurately reads situations to pinpoint critical issues.
• Listens to understand issues from different perspectives.
• Diffuses tension and handles emotional situations effectively.
• Helps adversarial parties identify common interests.
• Strives to settle differences equitably.
• Resolves conflicts without damaging relationships.
• Limits the negative aspects of conflict while enhancing the positive.
• Focuses on improving learning and group outcomes, including effectiveness and performance.

Let’s Dive In

What is your level of comfort with conflict management and resolution? How would you rate yourself? Who do you know that excels in this area? What aspects of their approach do you value?

These are important questions to consider.

For me, “listening to understand issues from different perspectives” is an area for growth. I believe I’m a good listener, but I often struggle with understanding issues from viewpoints other than my own. Our life experiences shape our perceptions and opinions, which can lead to conflict when we mistake our opinions for facts.

Consider the current political environment: it’s rife with diverse perspectives and conflicts. Yet, if we are committed to the achievement mindset and being an Integritor, we must commit to listening to understand different perspectives. How do we begin?

To truly listen, we need to put down our devices and focus on one thing: LISTENING! Personally, I take notes, but sometimes it’s beneficial to put down the pen and be fully present in the moment.

Ask yourself:

• What are you seeing?
• What are you hearing?
• What observations can you make about what’s being said?

Ask clarifying questions such as "Who? What? Where? When?" to gain deeper insight. Observe your own reactions: What are you feeling? Are these feelings influencing your response? Are you mentally preparing your counterarguments? Reset yourself as needed.

Repeat what you’ve heard to confirm that you’re truly listening.

If you start with these steps the next time you face a conflict, consider what you might learn and how the outcome might differ. Perhaps you’ll see a new result.

We’ll never know until we try.